Baby & Dior First 3 Chapters

 

_Full Novel Drops 11/17/21

 

 

Branton “Baby” Benjamin the new leader of Atlanta’s Southside Crips had a plan to make the streets better than the ones he grew up on. With him in charge, crime was down, and everyone could focus on the money.

 

Baby was the supreme ruler of the streets and no one dared to test him. He was feared by many, but more than that, he was loved and respected even more. Especially by his long-time best friend and girlfriend Dior.

 

Baby would do anything for Dior, including give his life for hers, and vice versa. Being together since they were kids caused them to be inseparable, but new challenges arise, and their bond is put to the test.

 

When a war is ignited, Baby must show why he was chosen to lead the Crips while Dior is struggling with the Queen title she carries.

 

Already with so much on her plate, her longing to put her family first puts even more of a strain on her relationship with the love of her life, Baby. Never one to think that she and Baby would ever part, Dior immediately is shown that might not be the case when he does the unthinkable.

 

Now wide open and confused, Wise, an out of town hustla that moves to Atlanta looking to expand his wealth stumbles in Dior’s path and the decisions she make aren’t the wisest when it comes to him, leaving her world spiraling even further. Especially when she realizes that Baby meant every promise he ever made her—promises that could land her in a grave.

 

In the midst of the storm, Fendi, Dior’s baby sister is wide open and in love with a gangsta that she refuses to name. Love so intense at Fendi and her boo’s young age could be dangerous when neither of them can control the emotional roller coaster that they take each other on. Fendi so caught up in her love life doesn’t realize the harm she brings to herself and her family until it could be too late.

 

Hendrix “Henny” Benjamin is a pure menace and he knows it. Being he knew that he was the only person that could sway between two gangs made him feel like he was not only royalty but invincible. Henny is a lady’s man, and although it was only one woman that he was madly in love with, his ego wouldn’t let him do right no matter the cost. “Young, rich, and Turnt” was the motto he lived by, but when tragedy strikes and he realizes it’s his fault, Henny turns the world upside down trying to make it right.

 

In this intense tale of Gang Love, Family drama, and violence, Myss Shan will have you glued to the edge of your seat anticipating what happens next.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Brinnnnggggggg!

The last school bell of the day rung, and quickly, I shut my book, and gathered the little belongings that I had at my desk. It was finally over. The smile that was plastered across my face couldn’t be hidden. A bitch had finally done it.

Where I was from, girls like me didn’t graduate high school. They either used the schoolhouse as a safe place, a place to sell drugs, or to just waste time when they were bored. None of these bitches cared about their education, but for me, it was imperative.

My name is Dior…Dior Jackson to be exact, and I was a 19-year-old, Queen Gangsta Disciple that would stretch a bitch or a nigga out for playin’ with me. My smooth, dark, blemish free skin would lead the wrong person to believe that I was some type of hood, African Goddess, and that I was sweet and innocent, and yea, I was that and then the opposite.

 I could be a muthafuckin’ problem, however, this wasn’t the life that I wanted, so I tried to lay as low as possible. Unfortunately for me, I was born into this gang life. My mama and daddy, God rest his soul, were both top ranking leaders of the GDs, which automatically gave me a rank that I didn’t want.

Not to be twisted, I loved my family, whether they were blood or related through gang. I just wasn’t with this gangsta shit anymore. My pops were murdered in cold blood because of this gang life, and right now, my mama was only on year six- or seven of a 25-year sentence. I had really lost count.

She’d murdered the nigga that had killed my daddy, which ultimately landed me, my twin brother Christian, our little sister Fendi, and little brother Nasa in foster care. We were all separated from one another for almost three years, but eventually, I found my siblings, and snatched them out of their homes. From there, we lived in the streets, willingly, until I ran into Baby, who stopped at nothing to make a better life for us all.

Baby.

Baby....mmh, mmh, mmh. That nigga…

“I know you saw my text message, Dior, because it said you read it 2 hours ago. Are you gonna help me fight this bitch Monnie or what?” my little sister Fendi quickly plucked me from my thoughts before I could get too deep.

I glared back at her, as she rushed up behind me with a mean mug on her pretty, chocolate face. I was traveling through the damn near empty halls, trying to hurry up and find my way towards the exit so I could get to my car. I couldn’t wait to get out of here and get home to my man.

 Even though we had a fight in this school damn near every day, the last day of school was the worst. It was the middle of the day, which gave the kids the rest of the day to get into some shit.

Everybody would be fighting somebody, and it was always guaranteed that a few kids weren’t going to make it home alive. I wasn’t trying to be involved in any of it. I had long ago proved myself to the streets and didn’t feel the need to make a useless statement. Everyone knew what it was with me, and they knew how I gave it up.

I peered over my shoulder at Fendi while she continued to follow behind me. Looking her up and down, I immediately frowned at what her little hot ass was wearing. She was only sixteen with the body of a twenty-year-old woman. She knew it, too, which was why everything she wore was always so tight, and a size too small.

The white halter top she was wearing had her titties practically spilling through the seams and the blue jean shorts were so far up her vagina that I was pretty sure they were stained with yeast.

 I couldn’t wait for the day that Baby or Christian would catch her like this. They were going to have shawty’s neck, and the thought of it had me delighted. She deserved it too for always trying to play somebody.

“I’m not helping you do shit. I told you to stand down when you asked me weeks ago, and I’m not telling you again,” I reiterated to Fendi, and she crossed her arms over her double D chest and frowned.

“Bitch, you only out for yourself, and let’s not forget that Lo-Lo is the real Queen and you just here standing in her place,” Fendi spat, and I rolled my eyes before stopping in my tracks.

I turned to face her. It was crazy how this little smart mouth hooker looked like a spitting image of our mother and me. My mother’s genes were strong, and she was sure to mark her daughters so that no one could ever deny her existence.

Fendi’s thick, gloss covered, pink lips were poked out and her hazel eyes were slanted and low, which led me to believe that she was angry with me. I knew because it was the same shit I did when I was mad, as well. I shrugged, moved directly into her, and crossed my arms over my chest. I imitated her exact stance. I wanted her, and her two little minions Amber, and Ryah to hear me loud and clear.

“Little girl, you heard what the fuck I said! Stand down. Do not go nowhere near Monnie, her cousins, or any of them pussy ass slobs. I mean what I said, Fendi. You know what happens if you try me,” I blatantly directed at her. I stared her down before I did the same thing with her friends.

“So, I’m supposed to just let all the shit she’s been doing slide? She disrespected me too many times and…”

“And I told your hardheaded ass, what does it matter what the fuck she says about you, Sain’t, and Henny? Let you tell it, the rumors about you and Henny are a lie and that you’re still with Sain’t. Are you fucking them both? You keep telling me that you’re not having sex yet. And if you aren’t, and this is all a lie, then why do you care what she’s going around saying if it isn’t true! Not starting shit with nobody over a rumor!”

“You know what…” Fendi went to say something but looked around like she was embarrassed by what I’d said. She grimaced before sucking her teeth and backed away with tears in her eyes.

I took in a deep breath watching as she turned her back towards me and bolted down the hallway. She wasn’t going to listen to me. She never did and that shit scared me more than anything in this world. I wasn’t always going to be able to be there for her, and I wished that she would cool it and try to focus on doing something more productive with her life.

Sadly, this gang life meant too much to her. It wasn’t like I could blame her. Just like me, Fendi had the Gangsta Disciples blood pumping like hot lava through her veins. Just like me, it was in her, and not on her. It was something that she would never be able to elude, and the thought of knowing that suddenly had me sick.

There wasn’t any escaping this chaos, and me graduating from school wasn’t going to make that any less true. We had managed to get out the hood after fighting so long, but still there was no escaping this world once you were in it.

    I released the breath I had been holding on to and tossed my bag over my shoulders. Rushing down the hallways, I tried to make it to Fendi and her clique before they could make it outside. No matter how bad my sister thought she was, she wasn’t no match for Monnie.

Monnie was a slob ass blood that was from Summerhill with her bitch ass. She was nineteen years old, solid like a little nigga, and never fought fair. She would literally eat Fendi alive, which was why I told her to leave well enough alone. I wasn’t scared of Monnie’s manly looking ass, but I also wasn’t trying to have my eyes cut out, or any of my fingers cut off like she was known for doing.

The moment I made it outside, I looked around to see where my sister and her friends had gone. The sun was shining bright and directly into my eyes making it hard for me to see. I squinted as I scanned the heavy crowd while trying to put my sight onto her.

Kids were everywhere, some snapping pics while others were moving back and forth between crowds. I was starting to panic from not being able to spot Fendi. My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach while a weird feeling slithered down my spine.

I quickly removed my cellphone from my back pocket and erratically walked around the campus in search for her. I knew her fast ass didn’t leave and was somewhere around here mixed up in somebody’s drama. I just knew she was.

“Diiiiiii!”

I looked over my shoulder and saw Ryah, Fendi’s best friend with a muddled look on her face. From where I was standing, I could see that she had tears in her eyes. I rushed over to where she was, and she took my hand into hers and led the way. The way Ryah’s hand trembled inside of mine caused my soul to shake. I hated this feeling. I’d had it so many times, and each time, it meant that things were bad.

I was so scared of what I was going to stumble upon as I was practically being yanked across the campus. I didn’t know why, because Monnie knew what was to come if she did anything to my sister. It wasn’t going to be just me she was going to have to deal with. She was gonna have to see Christian, Baby, and the whole gang and I knew for a fact, Monnie wasn’t looking for that type of smoke. We didn’t play fair either, not for nothing. Knowing that, allowed me to calm down, and act like the Queen that I was even if I didn’t want to be.

“Where is she? Where is Fendi?” I screamed, wishing Ryah would say something instead of dragging me along.

“That bitch Monnie is crazy. She ain’t right in the head. I told Fendi to leave her alone, too, but she wouldn’t listen to me either. You know I’mma have her back regardless though, Di,” Ryah rambled as we made our way towards the back of the school, near the bleachers.

“What happened to Fendi? I swear Monnie bet not…” I started but when my eyes landed on Fendi’s back, I took off running in her direction. “Fendiiiii!”

She had her back to me, and she was kneeling on the ground while everyone was either standing around staring or recording on their phones. In the distance, I could suddenly hear sirens, so immediately I knew someone had been seriously hurt. The closer I had gotten to Fendi, I spotted Monnie making her way through the crowd with her hand in the air. She was getting ready to strike an unexpecting Fendi, but she had me all the way fucked up.

I ran faster, faster than I ever had in my life and tackled Monnie like we were two football, linebacker bitches on a field. I struck her dead in her face with my fist, knocking the snide smirk that she wore from thinking she was about to touch my little sister. She tried to slice me with the razor that was in her right hand, but I popped her in the nose forcing her to draw both hands to her face.

Before I could even react any further, I briefly looked around and noticed that every Crip in school was now fighting them a pussy ass slob, doing exactly what I didn’t want. Baby was gonna have my head even if I wasn’t the one whom had started it. Regardless, though, I had to stand for mine, so I made sure I fucked Monnie up. She already had it coming to her ass, and now that I saw her even raising her hand in my sister’s direction, made me wanna kill this bitch.

I reached for the razor that had fallen out of her hand, swiped it up in mine and in one quick movement, had slashed Monnie from ear to ear. Blood splattered everywhere and within seconds Monnie was no longer moving.

Standing to my feet, I took in a deep breath, realizing what I had done. My hands were covered with that slob’s blood and here she was laying directly under me, looking dead as a muthafucka.

I sighed as anger and regret started to fill me. Fendi gonna make me fuck her up; I thought to myself as I begun to slowly back up, never taking my eyes off Monnie. The minute I got ready to turn around, I tripped over something and fell flat on my ass. I was ready to start wildly swinging the razor until I realized what was going on. It was Amber; Fendi’s other best friend. She was laying there, lifeless, with half her tongue hanging out her mouth.

My eyes jolted from her and over to Monnie again. Suddenly, I didn’t feel so bad for what I had done to her. Somehow, I knew that Amber was an accident and Fendi was supposed to be laying right there in her place.

Fuck. This shit gotta stop; I thought, only I knew that was an understatement. I had just murdered the King of the Bloods’ daughter and knew this wasn’t going to be taken lightly.

 

    ***

“Okay and you yelling at me ain’t gonna change anything! I told you I did what the fuck I had to do,” I screamed out, repeating myself for like the 100th time to Baby who stood over me looking like a fucking warden in a prison.

I glared up at him, his chest poked out, making him seem as if he was made up of steel, chocolate, and tattoos. He took in a long toke of the Backwood and shied away from me for a moment. Today was supposed to be one of the best days of my life, but instead, here I was fighting with the love of my life over some shit my little sister started.

Luckily for me, Monnie didn’t die. I guess I could say lucky. Somebody had got her ass to the hospital just in the nick of time, cause from what I’d heard, she was in critical condition down at Grady. I kinda hoped she would do us all a favor and just code out and die; but then again, maybe the problem we faced would be less severe if she survived.

Either way it went, I knew Draco was coming for The GDs regardless. Everyone knew he didn’t play about his sweet Monnie even though she was far from sweet. Monnie was as evil as they came, and we all knew that Draco was the reason she did and got away with so much.

He was a legend in the game that had been head of the bloods and streets for a very long time. Not only did he have notoriety in Atlanta, but he also had respect around the world and controlled his home of Jamaica with an iron fist. Even though we were some savages I had to really remember that Draco's reach was much longer and wider than Baby’s.

Damn I really fucked up; I thought to myself as the reality of my actions started to dawn on me.

“So, you don’t hear me fuckin’ talking to you?” Baby quipped causing my head to snap and stare up at him again.

“I…I said I fucked up, Baby, damn. Today wasn’t supposed to be like this!” I whined, not really knowing what else to say. I had been stopped listening to him lecture me after I explained myself the first time. Nothing else he said was gonna change my decision or the outcome. “I just graduated, Bae. You know what I went through to get to this point. I’m supposed to be celebrating.”

“Yea and instead you out slicing a bitch neck and putting us in a fuckin’ war that we can’t afford right now! All behind Fendi’s dumb ass! You know what…fuck that, I’m putting her ass in the streets. Hardheaded ass little girl. Tired of her shit,” Baby ranted on before he suddenly rushed out of the room.

My eyes bucked and I raced behind him, tugging at his meaty arms. He tossed his elbow back, causing me to slam against the hallway’s wall. My head thumped against the surface, and I grimaced from the pain, before I shook it off and continued after him.

“Bae no! No…no…no! Fendi didn’t have anything to do with this!”

“You a muthafuckin’ lie! Don’t lie to me! You know I can’t stand a muh’fucka that’ll lie to me!” Baby roared out his favorite mantra while moving through the house like a maniac.

The moment he made it to the living room, Fendi was already standing and waiting with fear heavily in her eyes. Her hands were ready to go up in defense. She didn’t have time to change out of her thot clothes this time. We had no choice but to hop in my ride, come straight home, and get the fuck out the way until things had died down from the fight that Fendi’s wild ass started.

“Baby…I…”

“Shut the fuck up and sit down!” Baby yelled, causing Fendi to look as if she had jumped out of her skin. “What the fuck is this shit you got on? You letting your sister walk around lookin’ like a damn slut, Dior? Is this how we raised you?”

Baby was the only person in the world that Fendi wouldn’t disrespect, at least not to his face. She knew what he was about and how he would have no mercy when putting her in her place or proving a point at her expense. She had been the subject of his wrath too many times, and for the life of me, I still couldn’t understand why she wouldn’t just straighten the fuck up.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please don’t be mad at Dior. She told me not to and I went to go and talk to Monnie and before I could even say anything, she came at me…and Amber jumped in my way and got hit instead. It all happened so fast,” Fendi cried hysterically, leaving Baby not the least bit fazed.

“I hope you ready to die for this gang life like you claim. Your sister just violated a Queen blood on your behalf. And what’s this supposed to be over Henny? A nigga that’ll never fucking touch you cause he not stupid enough and his muh’fuckin’ loyalty lies with me! Don’t let a nigga get you killed, shawty. I taught you to be smarter than that. Taught you to think with your head and not with that shit down there! On gang, Dior ain’t touching shit else that got anything to do with you. Any kinda heat that comes your way, you keep it away from my girl, a’ight?”

“Bae…”

“Shut the fuck up!” Baby sneered, briefly glaring at me before he walked up closer to where Fendi sat.

“Nasa and Christian gonna watch you like a muh’fuckin hawk because they not gonna have shit else to do all summer…”

“Huh?” Christian cut in, taking his attention away from his phone. He mean-mugged Baby before standing to his feet.

“Sit your ass down nigga!” Baby barked and Christian grimaced before he did as he was told. “You heard what the fuck I said. You and that nigga gonna watch her. She don’t leave this house without my permission. You make sure you let Nasa know.”

“How the fuck I’m supposed to take care of business if I’m running behind Fendi all day?” Christian questioned and Baby sarcastically chuckled.

“Nigga shawty just started a war behind this pussy Henny. It’s ‘bout to be Iraq out here in these streets. Fuck you talking about? Go find Nasa, and Henny, too. Tell ‘em, come home now!”

“I thought you wanted me to watch Fendi! Make your mind up,” Christian huffed, his agitation growing.

He frowned before he glared at me, and then shot Fendi a death stare who quickly jolted her head to the floor while twiddling with her fingers.

“Take her with you!” Baby grimaced before bumping past me and heading towards our room.

I glared at Fendi and then Christian before backpedaling and going to see about Baby. The moment we were behind closed doors again, he turned around and stared at me and the steam radiating off his body was enough to blow my head off. I took in a deep breath and went to touch Baby’s chest when he slightly shoved me back and started to pace the floor in the room.

I watched my man with tons of emotions coursing through my veins. I loved this man from the top of his head, down to the very tips of his toes. No, what I meant to say was, I loved him so much that I literally felt him in the depths of my soul.

 I loved him enough to know that at my young age, there was no other man other than Baby for me. This nigga was me and I was him; he was all over me as I was all over him. There wasn’t a bitch alive that didn’t know that Baby belonged to Dior, and definitely knew how he was coming about me.

I had been knowing him since I was an infant almost. His family and mine were Gang, some related by blood in some way, and some not. My father and Baby’s father were best friends while our mothers got along for the sake of their niggas. We were all one, big happy family, until at some point things got bad before they got worse.

My dad was the first to be killed, and that was all it took to destroy everything that our parents had basically built from the ground up. My daddy had been the head of the Gangsta Disciples with Baby’s dad being up next as the half-man, and of course, our mamas were Queens Disciples.

When my father passed away, it seemed like no one could function without him. I guess no one really realized how much of the glue he was to everything around us.

Months after he died, Baby’s parents were then killed, which everyone believed they were assassinated by the police. Baby and his siblings were taken by child services, while my mama’s mental health continued to perish.

My mama literally lost her damn mind. She was no longer taking care of me and my siblings and half of the time, she didn’t even come out of her room. Most nights when I wanted to check on her, I would stand outside of her door, and listen as she would talk to my father ghost or be crying about how bad she missed him.

Him being gone was really taking a huge toll on her, and I didn’t even realize how bad until one day, she just snapped. My siblings and I were yanked out of our classes, taken down to child services and was chastised like we were criminals. Like it was our fault that our parents were into the life that they were.

All we heard from this one, white social worker was how our daddy was this big dope dealing, gangsta that got himself killed. She even went as far as to explain how our insane mama thought it would be a good idea to pour blood, followed by live rats, on the man she thought was responsible for our daddy’s death, and then setting them all on fire. That social worker told us how we should go to jail, too, or die, so that we didn’t grow up to be like our parents were.

After breaking us down as much as they could, the social worker told us that a family member would be down to get us, but that family member never came. Everyone in my family either stayed away because they feared getting caught up, locked up, or just didn’t give a fuck. Me and my siblings were torn from each other and didn’t reunite until years later.

By that time, I had already run away from the group home I was in and had eventually come into Baby and his little brother Ares’ path. We were all homeless and trying to survive after all the tragedies we’d faced. Eventually, Baby was able to reclaim what was rightfully his with this gang shit. It wasn’t easy, but somehow, he had.

He deserved it, too, because he was everything that a leader should be. Having him in my life, I grew to understand how my mama felt before she snapped. I knew that if something were to ever happen to Baby, I’d lose my mind before I said fuck it and risked it all.

“You don’t fuckin’ hear me talking to you?” Baby yelled, and I snapped out of my thoughts and stared up at him.

 “Huh? What did you ask me?” I stammered as I ran my eyes over him.

I didn’t even realize he’d gotten undressed, all the way down to his boxers. Unintentionally, my eyes diverted to his print, causing the sides of my mouth to water. Baby had been the only man I had ever been with, and I was pretty sure there was nothing better. This nigga just really had it like that.

“You gotta start calling me before you do shit, man…I understand what you say you felt you had to do, but maybe I could’ve done something to fix it before it escalated to this. I don’t have time to be fighting a war and…”

He was the epitome of what a real nigga was; and just did this boss shit effortlessly. God, I was so in love. Staring up at him, I bit down on my bottom lip and gazed into his light brown eyes. I could always see why my nigga had these bitches pressed for a chance with him.

   At 6’3, Baby practically towered over everywhere, and not only was he tall, but he was built, too. His arms were like MAC-11s while his chest resembled fucking cannons. Besides the war wounds, his toffee-colored skin was a flawless canvas for the many tattoos that he had.

“Henny gonna make me fuck him up, ‘cause I refuse to believe shawty that pressed behind him and Monnie for nothing…”

 I ran my tongue across my lips and pulled my shirt over my head, tossing it to the floor. I then stepped out of my jeans, followed by my underwear. Placing my hand on Baby’s chest, I got ready to drop down to my knees when he pushed me back causing me to stagger all the way to the floor. I scowled up at him, when I noticed he was staring at me like he was disgusted with me.

    “Why would you push me like that?” I yelled, and quickly hopped to my feet.

    “What the fuck is you doing? I know you don’t think you about to get some dick?” Baby questioned as if he was floored by my notion.

    “Wha…Huh?” I asked, confused.

    “I’m standing here tryna talk to you about some serious shit and you standing here getting naked and trying to suck my dick like this shit a game!”

    “I wasn’t tryna suck your dick!” I denied, embarrassed as shit.

    “Damn…you sure are lying’ a lot. Fuck is up with that?”

    “I mean…Baby, why the hell are you standing here naked? You just had on all your damn clothes, and I look up and you’re standing in front of me in your boxers.”

    “If your simple ass would’ve been listening to what the fuck I been saying to you, I told you I was about to hop in the shower so I can try and fix this shit!” Baby yelled before he looked over at me again with a baffled look, and then stormed off while shaking his head.

    I tucked my arms over my chest as I stared at his back, suddenly pissed the hell off. This day wasn’t supposed to go like this. I had worked my ass off for years taking care of Baby and his brothers, my own sister, and my brothers, as well as this nigga’s little cousins while trying to do what I needed to do so that I could make something of my life. It took me mad long to even finish school because of all the adversities I faced, but I had never gave up.

I never wanted to make my mama or daddy feel like that everything they tried to do for us was in vain. No matter how hard it had gotten, I had accomplished something, and not one person had said congratulations to me. It was eating me up that it hadn’t even been acknowledged, not even the slightest mention.

    I was about to say fuck it, but instead rushed into the bathroom, and yanked the shower door back. Baby stood there in all his gangsta glory, while allowing the hot water to fall over him. He wouldn’t even look at me, but I wasn’t going to move until he had. I tucked my arms over my chest again, leaned against the frame of the door, and squinted my eyes while staring at him.

    “I ain’t got shit to say to you, Dior,” Baby said, quietly, but with evident agitation.

    “You couldn’t even tell me congratulations today, and you know how hard I worked to get here. Then we were supposed to be out celebrating. You just gon’ forget about that, too!” I said and got nothing back but silence. “Baby?”

    “You better hope we make it out of all this shit alive while you talm’ ‘bout celebrating some shit. Get the fuck away from me right now,” Baby spat, and I sneered before I slammed the glass door shut and stormed out of the bathroom.

    I stood in the middle of the bedroom with tears spilling down my face from being so angry. I wanted to explode, but I knew that it wasn’t going to do me any good. Instead, I kicked the shoes that were near me, and decided to say fuck it and take me a nap.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The dash, a digi', the schedule busy
My head in a hoodie, my shorty a goodie
My cousins are crazy, my cousins like Boogie
Life is amazin', it is what it should be
Been here for ten but I feel like a rookie

 

Flying down the highway, I bobbed my head to Lil’ Baby’s Yes Indeed featuring Drake while trying my hardest not to go crazy out here. I had a draco laid across my lap, ready for whatever that was coming my way. It had finally felt like I was about to get some type of normalcy in my life, but now I had to deal with this shit that Dior’s pea-head ass sister had caused. As much as I hated having to go crazy, I was always war ready. Couldn’t nobody tell me that I wasn’t built for this shit.

A nigga had been on go-mode ever since I had been a little jit, and although I was more than ready to calm it down, I knew that it wouldn’t be no time soon; especially not after this.

This gang shit was all I knew, but I also knew that I was something more than what muh’fuckas thought I was meant to be. Ever since I had been old enough to understand, my folks always instilled in me how much of a king I was. They didn’t only teach me how to be a gangsta, but they blessed me with plenty knowledge so I wouldn’t be no dummy out here in these streets. They knew one day I would have to fend for myself, and when that time came, they wanted me to always be ready.

Unfortunately, the time for me to step up came way sooner than a nigga had ever imagined. I was thirteen years old when the pussy ass police killed my mom and pops in cold blood. Like I had said, this gang shit was all I knew. My pops were one of the Gangsta Disciples top leaders along with Dior’s daddy, and they really had shit lit out here.

The hood was getting money, it was peaceful, and that was the one thing these white folks ain’t like. As long as shit was good in the hood, the police didn’t have a reason to lock us up and sentence us to that slave shit they called prison or kill our black asses.

I’ve always believed that my people along with Dior’s pops was killed by the police, and although I couldn’t prove it right now, I wasn’t gonna stop until I could. They had really robbed our families, forcing us to go through shit that wasn’t even necessary. Soon as they placed me and my two younger brothers Ares, and Henny into foster care, I knew it wasn’t gonna be a permanent situation, especially not when they separated us.

I got up out that muh’fucka soon as I could and went straight back to the hood. My auntie and uncle took me in, claiming that they tried to get us from the state, but was unsuccessful. It didn’t even matter though because living with them for less than two weeks had gave me my first lesson on how blood wasn’t always thicker than water.

I had tried to convince them to help me locate my brothers and that if they did, I would make sure I was responsible for all of us. I didn’t even know how I was gonna do it but knew that I had to figure it out. Somehow, they took my perseverance as me being caked up, and eventually used their misconception against me.

 One morning, I woke up to my hands tied behind my back, and a pistol in my face. My so-called family had damn near beat me to death while demanding I give them the money that they thought my pops had left behind. Had it not been for me playing dead, I don’t even think I would be alive today.

Once I had gotten a little older, I had tried to slide on they asses, but noticed that life had beat me to it. Both my auntie and uncle were on that dope bad and ended up being some of my top customers. For that reason, I left them alone. I got my revenge daily when them muh’fuckas would suck on that glass dick, unable to get that monkey off their backs.

“I’m about to pull up,” I said into the receiver of the phone after my little brother Ares had answered my call to him.

“Bet, my G,” he said before he dead the line.

I dropped my phone into my lap and slowly pulled up to the gate that blocked off Ares’ neighborhood to the rest of the world. After entering the code, I waited until there was enough space for me to proceed before I slid through. Looking through my rearview, I peeped as the three black Jeeps behind me eased in and pursued directly after me.

Ares lived on the outskirts of Atlanta, in Dallas, Georgia; a gated, quiet ass community, away from everybody. It had only taken a little over a year of us being separated before I linked back up with him again. Like me, he understood that being caught up in the system wasn’t for us. We were too smart and had too much potential to sit around letting a muh’fucka collect a check off us while treating us like we couldn’t be no savages out here.

Our mindset was practically in the same place while enduring group homes and foster care. By time I had turned fifteen, I was on beast mode, robbing any and everybody. I didn’t give no fucks. If you had something I wanted, I was gonna take it. My newfound talent was getting me hella paid and it had been like fate, when it led me to my brother Ares.

I had hit this little liquor store for a couple of hundred, and as soon as I got my cash and ran up out that muh’fucka, I cut through the alley, only to run up on some niggas beating up on my youngin’ Ares. He’d jacked them for their stash a few blocks over and they ran down on him, ready to kill him when I intervened.

I caught my first three bodies that day and made sure to never let jit out my sight again. That whole situation had made me and Ares’ bond deeper than ever. He knew I was really with the shits and was willing to murk whoever behind my folk. For the gang, I was with whatever, but behind my brothers, I wanted all the smoke.

  I was on a mission to finish what my pops had started, and the world was gonna for sure feel me while I was at it and that was on gang.

“Y’all fall back for a minute,” I nodded at my three shootas Hammer, Slick, and Heavy.

Before I could even park good enough, they had hopped out the Jeeps on straight go mode. I knew my youngins were trained and ready for whatever, and preferably that stick talk. They kept a stick on them and hardly ever missed, which was why they went almost everywhere I went.

“That’s a bet,” Heavy answered as they all retreated to their trucks.

I headed down the long driveway to Ares’ crib and the door swung open before I could even make it up the porch. My lil nigga stood in front of me, piped up, looking exactly like my ass. I could tell he had been stressing the fuck out ever since I’d told him what was going down from the wrinkles that creased his forehead. The Benjamin boys all had that problem.

He was only a couple of years younger than me at twenty years old but was an inch and a half taller than I was. We loc’d it up before giving each other a brief hug and then going inside of his home.  

Looking around, I smiled at how much better it looked since the last time I had been here. We’d only been seeing the fruits of our labor over the past six months and was just now really getting up out the hood.

Ares and his baby mama Sunny took every dime they had and bought this home a few months ago, and even though I felt a way about my youngin’ being so far from his family, I understood. The objective was always to grow, and Ares was doing that and truly coming into his own. I was proud of him.

“How Dior and Fendi holdin’ up?” Ares asked, and I scoffed as we entered his family room.

“Mannnn, they good. Dior don’t have a fuckin’ scratch and Fendi’s little fast ass didn’t either. Said Fendi’s homegirl lost her damn tongue, though. That hoe Monnie is a savage so I can’t even be too mad at my shawty for what she did. Had I been there, I probably would’ve lost it and just put a bullet in baby girl’s forehead, I ain’t gon’ even lie to ya’,” I stated, truthfully, before falling back onto the sofa.

“Nigga, you wouldn’t have ‘cause you would’ve thought about the consequences first. They say Monnie not doing too good and if shawty don’t make it, you already know what we facing.”

“We facing the shit regardless, so, might as well have slumped that slob ass hoe. You know Draco ain’t gonna let that shit go unanswered.”

“This shit, crazy, man. We just started getting this paper right. Thank God, I cashed out for this house. Nigga can’t afford to be taking no losses,” Ares acknowledged, and I sighed already knowing what he was feeling.

We had worked fucking hard to get here, too. From the time our people had gotten murdered, we’d been at it. The downfall of our folk was the end of the disciples we once knew. Shit had fallen apart faster than I could even blink my eye, mostly due to greed, jealousy, or being taken down by twelve.

After the dismantle, the Gang was back on its dumb, bully shit, and had the streets literally in a war zone for years. When niggas weren’t getting no money, they were angry, and didn’t have nothing better to do but fuck shit up.

 Eventually, when I had gotten right, I went back to the hood, bringing my gang with me and basically turned shit all the way around. I literally had everybody calling me Mayor Baby because I wasn’t playing no games out here. When I say I was really bout it, it was something that I most definitely could stand on.

 My parents had invested a lot and worked too damn hard for the streets to be going out bad like they had been. It took a few years to get things to back to where it was supposed to be, but we were here now, and to the point to where everybody could be happy, and the focus was family, and money. That was why I was so pissed off that Dior felt like she had no choice and put us in this situation.

“What you over here thinkin’ bout, bruh?” Ares asked, pulling me from my thoughts. I looked up and saw him standing in front of me, waving a Heineken in my face. I grabbed the bottle and popped the top and then relaxed into the seat of the sofa. “You talk to your dumb ass brother?”

“I been calling this nigga and he ain’t answering. That’s what I was just over here thinkin’ about. I gotta get this nigga in line right along with Fendi’s ass. He’s just dumb for no fuckin’ reason and Dior can’t see how much she spoils her damn sister,” I huffed, before staring at the bottle of alcohol like I was trying to solve a mystery with it.

“You think he’s fuckin’ with Fendi behind Sain’t’s back like everyone saying?”

I shrugged as I looked up at Ares and thought about what he was asking me. Everyone could see that Henny and Fendi had gotten real close lately, but I had already warned them not to be on no dumb shit. Fendi was just too young, and Henny was a hothead that gave no fucks about nothing. He would destroy that girl, and I was only trying to protect them both.

Even then, I hoped they knew not to play with me, but I couldn’t lie and say that part of me wasn’t wondering if they had crossed that line. There had been too many occasions of somebody saying that Fendi and Monnie were into it, and each time it had been because of Henny. I had never asked the nigga about it ‘cause I never thought I needed to, but now, I was starting to question if I should.

“Let me call Loc again,” I said, sitting my beer down on the coffee table and then taking my cell out.

I hit the button to FaceTime Henny and then sat back while waiting for him to answer. Just when I was about to hang up, the call started to connect, and Henny’s face appeared on the screen. His eyes were low and heavy, and he were tugging at the tips of his dreads like he always did when he was nervous. This nigga was me all over again, as well. Same build, same skin tone, same DNA, shit…another replica.

“Where you at?”

“Um…” Henny cleared his throat and sat back. I peeped his background and saw, glittery curtains and knew then that he was laid up with a bitch. “umm…shit, with Sain’t them ‘bout to get ready to come to the house.”

“Wit Sain’t, huh? Y’all at a bitch house?” I questioned and he shook his head no. “That nigga got pink ass curtains, huh, and you just sitting up with your shirt off with Sain’t?”

“I mean he at a bitch house, but I’m…”

“Nigga stop fuckin’ lying to me! You know how I feel ‘bout a muh’fucka that’ll lie to me! You got all this shit going on around you and you got the nerve to be laid up with a bitch right now?” I yelled, feeling my frustration rise by the second. I stood up from the sofa and nodded for Ares to follow me. “Send yo’ muh’fuckin’ location, I’m on my way. And yo’ bitch ass bet not move.”

“Yea…whatever,” Henny responded before he dead the line in my face.

I sucked my teeth and stormed angrily out of Ares’ crib knowing if I didn’t calm down by time I saw this nigga, I was liable to really fuck him up. The kid was always acting like he was invincible, and I knew it was because he had spent too much time up under that nigga Draco in Jamaica.

Draco was the leader of the slobs and had been since my pops was over the Crips. I wasn’t even gonna act like I didn’t know the nigga was a savage with his shit. When he came at you, you knew how he was coming, and it was definitely with the intentions of wrecking everything.

Even then, I also knew I was a beast with my shit, too and came with a bunch of young, ready niggas that would go dumb for what they believed in.

 With mutual understanding, we both knew what it was, so we kept our people in line. The GDs knew not to violate none of his people, territory, and vice versa. Any type of violation had to go through me, and I was always man enough to pull up on Draco if I had an issue, and the man never hesitated to give me the same respect. We both wasn’t tryna see no more deaths in our circle, and not to mention, we both had love for the same lil’ nigga.

I wasn’t so lucky to find Henny as quickly as I had Ares after we all got separated. It had taken me damn near five years to locate where he was, and all along, that fuck nigga Draco had him.

 Draco claimed to have found Henny near death and had chosen to take him in because he had felt bad for him. He said he’d had no idea whom Henny was, and thought he’d just came across an orphan. He’d taken him all the way to Jamaica to raise him, and part of me felt like that was because he was on some sick and twisted shit.

On God, I believe he only took my brother in so that he could further have one up on my pops by turning his son into a pussy ass slob. Draco had been beefing with my people since I’d been a jit, and it was nothing worse than having one of your own turn opp whether it was by force or by choice.

Why else would he take him out of the country, and only bring him back to the states years later after he’d practically brainwashed the kid?

When I found out that Henny was in Draco’s possession, I immediately went after him, only for them both to be on some dumb shit. My lil’ youngin’ was acting like he ain’t know me or Ares.

It took about a year and a half of back-and-forth drama before out of nowhere, Henny showed up saying he was ready to come home. Since then, he hadn’t left, but he didn’t cut ties with Draco either. Him and Draco’s daughter, Monnie were supposed to be a thing, and I understood the nigga had grown a bond with them. I never tried to press him about picking sides, but always told him he’d better hope the time never came where he had to.

Seemed to me like that time was now, though.

***

 

“He in there,” some red, thick chick said as she stood on the other side of the door to the address that Henny had sent to me.

She was wearing a lil’ panty and bra set and when she turned around, her fat ass was all on display. I already knew shawty was a straight up rat. She had bright, red ass hair, red eyebrows, and two gold fronts in her mouth.

 Ares and I glanced at one another before we followed behind her and were led to where this nigga Henny were. Jit was draped in a fuckin’ robe, on some Godly shit while playing some hoe ass video game. The tip of a blunt hung from his lips while he blew out clouds of trees effortlessly and seeming not to have a care in the world.

Seeing him so nonchalant had me pressed and caused me to rush his ass. I swiped the game controller out of his hand, ready to pounce on him when Ares grabbed me and pushed me back. Henny sat there with his chest heaving looking as if he were vexed, and wanted to bark back, but knew better.

“Babe, I’mma be in the back if you need me,” shawty that answered the door said to this fool and he eyed her before slouching in his seat. She bent over and reached for the pack of Swishers that sat next to him when he grabbed a handful of her ass. “Nigga…”

“You got that shit all on display like I ain’t told yo’ ass they were coming’, so you might as well let my brothers see what the box and mouth do,” Henny suggested, his voice scruffy with agitation. She scoffed as if she was offended, but I could tell ma’ was with whatever. Sadly, she looked young as hell.

“Don’t act like you don’t know the price,” she told him, and he frowned.

“Bitch, stop with the cap. If I say you fuckin’, you fuckin’. Outta here tryna flex like you don’t know what’s good.”

“This nigga…” Ares smirked and chuckled, but quickly fixed his face when I glared at him.

“She already…”

“Aye, Henny, shut the fuck up and tell yo’ hoe to excuse us for a second!” I snapped and they both squinted in my direction. Shawty didn’t dare say a word, however, as she quickly got out the way, leaving the three of us alone. “You fuckin’ Fendi?”

“What?” Henny lowered his gaze before he took a pull from the weed and shook his head.

“You heard what the fuck I asked. You fuckin’ her or not?”

“Nah, can’t believe you would even come at me like that, Loc’. You know me better than that,” Henny denied, as he extended the hay to Ares while refusing to look my way.

“She ain’t out here going dumb for nothing. Muh’fuckas saying y’all fucking behind Sain’t’s back and that’s the reason she kept coming for Monnie and why you and your boy got light smoke. That explains why he ain’t been to the crib as much anymore.”

“Me and Fendi chilled too hard one night. Shit got out of hand, we kissed for a little while but that’s it. I stopped it before it got too far. I told her it couldn’t happen again, and I thought we had an understanding, but shawty started acting retarded after she found out I gave Monnie some dick again. I told her lil’ crazy ass she needed to chill out, but damn, I ain’t think it was gonna come to all this. As far as me and Sain’t, I was real with my boy about what happened and if he chooses to be in his feelings about it then that’s on him.”

“So, that’s all y’all did was kiss? You ain’t never fuck Fendi?” Ares asked him again and he adamantly shook his head no.

“But you still fuckin’ with Monnie, though?” I questioned, and he nodded and ran his hand down his face like he was embarrassed.

“Every now and then, we fuck around, but nothing serious.”

“What’s every now and then? What’s nothing serious? When’s the last time?”

“Damn nigga…”

“Just answer the fuckin’ question,” I yelled, and he shook his head.

“Like two or three days ago when I went to holla at Draco about some shit. She was there and he wasn’t. We fucked and I bounced. I ain’t talked to her since.”

“How many times I tell you any time you giving dick to these hoes, it’s always serious. You playing with a woman’s feelings, somebody’s bound to get hurt.”

“Monnie knows what it is, so it’s no way she can be hurt by how I move…”

“What about Fendi? Does she know?”

“I’m not fuckin Fendi, but I did make it clear like I said that we was not making the mistake of crossing that line again,” Henny adamantly stated, and I had no reason not to believe him. He seemed like he was keeping it a buck with me.

“Who your loyalty lies with, Hendrix?” I asked, calling him by his government.

He frowned at me as Ares pushed the weed in my direction. I took it from him and eyed my baby brother waiting on him to verbally tell me what I already knew. The nigga might’ve spent a lot of time with that fool Draco, but Henny wasn’t stupid. Even if he had tried to act like he ain’t know a nigga when we first got back in contact, I knew it was all cap.

Our folks were heavily involved in our lives, and they taught me to take real good care of my little brothers and that was what I always did. Although he was only eight when we were disconnected, I knew that Henny had a lot of memories of me and Ares to stand on. It was no way he didn’t.

“Damn, it’s like that?” Ares questioned; his brows furrowed when Henny didn’t speak.

“’Cause I don’t know why Baby always tryna play a nigga. You know what it is with me, and you know I’m rocking with my family. I’m with my brothers and the Gang all day. Don’t question me like that, Loc,” Henny confirmed, and I nodded before I stood to my feet and handed the hay back to him.

“Bet. I just wanted to see you and ask you that shit face to face. You know how I get down. Oh…and remember I always told you that one day you was gon’ have to pick a side, jit. I need you to get at Draco and see if you can find out what the play is. I need to be ready.”

“How am I supposed to do that?” Henny sighed and I stared down at him while he now suddenly sat like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.  

Yea, I was most definitely finna apply that necessary pressure on the youngin’.

“Nigga, figure it the fuck out. You started this mess, now, clean it the fuck up,” I ordered and then headed towards the door to leave. When I noticed that Ares wasn’t behind me, I stopped in my tracks and turned to look at him. “Let’s go, jit.”

“I’mma fall back for a second and see what shawty talkin’ about,” Ares said, referring to the lil’ piece that Henny was slutting out. “Shit, you might as well, too. Life about to get real tense. Might as well have you a little fun while you at it.”

“Aye…” I started when Henny and Ares looked at each other and burst out laughing.

“You know this nigga ain’t never had no pussy other than Dior’s. I’m starting to wonder if he really that scared of sis or just scared he might like getting some new pussy a little too much,” Henny cracked, and I blew him off.

“Or scared that another bitch ain’t gon’ fall for that weak shit he be putting down. You know Dior really be the one having him running and screaming,” Ares joined in while they continued to laugh at my expense.

“Ayyyyye…” I dragged. “…fuck both of y’all. And maybe I just don’t wanna deal with the problems you niggas be having with these bitches. Ever thought about that?” I couldn’t help but crack a smile and chuckle a little my damn self at these fools. “Ares, one hour my G, then you better be hitting my jack. And Henny, I expect you to be home tonight. Don’t make me have to come and find you, Loc.”

I didn’t even wait for either of them to answer before I headed out and shut the door behind me. The little hoe that Henny was fucking with had to be in her bag because shawty was laying her head in a bad ass condo downtown.

 It was the type of shit that Dior always said she wanted to live in one day and had quickly reminded me that I needed to make that happen for my girl. It could be our own little getaway spot when we wanted to escape our annoying ass siblings and the responsibilities that came with them. Dior would love some shit like that.

Dior…Dior…Dior.

People could crack on me all day, but that girl was a nigga’s rock for real. She was literally my best friend and being that we had already grew up on the same block as one another and always at each other’s crib, it just made our bond that much more gangsta. When I ran back into Dior in the streets, I never intended to do nothing but look out for her on the strength that I felt like she was family.

 We were all some jits, lost as fuck, and not knowing how the hell we were gonna survive. I figured we’d all be better off if we stuck together and thugged it out while looking out for one another. It ended being much easier that way. Us working together was how our family ended up being so tightly bonded. It was just like how our parents had done in the past, so we really were only repeating history.

We had really gone through some gutta times, and even when I wanted to, Dior never folded not even once, and that was what made me start looking at her a lot differently. She had gone from being like a lil’ sister to wifey, even at our young age. She had suddenly become exactly what I had needed in my life.

 It was going on six years and baby girl had been nothing but a blessing to me. She took care of me, her brothers and sister, my hard-head brothers, plus my lil’ cousins all the while going to school, and I had never once heard her complain about it. I’d set the world on fire about that one. Niggas could play with me if they wanted to when it came to Dior, but they had better be ready to die behind it.

    Me: Bae put a sexy ass dress or somethin on. Reservations at 8 and pack a overnight bag

I pressed send on the text to Dior and then slid the phone into my pocket just as the elevators slid open and I walked inside. I might’ve told Dior that we weren’t gonna celebrate, but I would never do my shawty like that.

If nobody else noticed her hard work, I most definitely did, and was always gonna be the first one to pipe her up. In the midst of any type of weather, I was the nigga that was gonna always let you know how bright you were shining. That was just how I was built.

The doors to the elevator opened once it reached the first level, and I stepped out running directly into some chick. She was holding on to a stack of mail that had gone flying to the floor when she had crashed into me. I leaned over, helped her gather her shit, handed it to her, and tried to walk away when she grabbed my arm to stop me.

“Branton,” she said, calling me by my government. “Branton Benjamin?” she reiterated, and I paused and glared at baby girl.

“Fuck you know me from?” I asked, defensively.

“You don’t recognize me? Wowwwwww. The fact that you used to always stick your tongue down my throat and your finger between my legs in gym class ain’t enough to make you remember kinda makes me feel like shit,” she reminded me, and I shook my head and chuckled before looking her over.

“Damn, you grew up,” I let her know, not even tryna hide the fact that I was lustfully looking her over. She was thick as fuck with her titties damn near on display, making it hard not to stare. “Lucie…”

“…yes, Lucie…and you grew up, too. Damn you were like a little fine ass, skinny freshman when I was a senior. I couldn’t believe how in love I were with you,” she bashfully laughed. “But damn look at you, now. You really, really grew up. Just looking good as fuck, and I see you still not for no bullshit.” Lucie licked her lips and stepped closer to me. “What’s been going on, Baby? You kinda disappeared after Homecoming. I never saw you again. I heard rumors, but you know, I just always hoped we ran into one another at some point.”

“Life. You know my people died…”

“I know and I’m very sorry for your loss…” she cut in, and I nodded when my phone vibrated. I pulled it out of my pocket to see that Dior had text me back.

Wife: I love you so much Baby. You make me so happy. And you know a bitch keeps a spennanight bag in the car for whenever I go over my side nigga house.

I chuckled before I bit down on my bottom lip and caught myself blushing before I frowned as I read over Dior’s text. I went to text her back, but when Lucie placed her finger underneath my chin, catching me off guard. I locked my phone and then placed it into my pocket before looking down into her chocolate face.

“My bad, I got a lot of shit going on. What was you saying?” I asked, giving Lucie all my attention since she was acting like it was greatly needed. I tucked both of my hands behind my back and extended an apologetic smile.

Lucie was one of the few girlfriends that I had back when I was a freshman in high school. She was always tryna fuck on a nigga, and something about a female being that young and horny all the time didn’t sit right with me. Because of that, I never took it no further than playing with shawty’s clit when we were bored.                                                                                                                                                                  

“I was saying that I would like to catch up sometimes. You know…that’s if you’re not married.”

“You could say that I am married. Me and my girl solid. But not for nothing, my bitch will kill you and me both though if we called ourselves tryna catch up. I’on think she would want us catching up on the shit we used to do, ya’ feel me?” I told her, and she giggled.

“Nobody said we had to do all that. Not that I wouldn’t mind, and maybe this time you using something other than your fingers.”

“Look at you…”

“Right, look at me. Like what you see?” she questioned, before doing a full 360, putting her tight little body on display. She was bad, but Dior would always be the baddest.  “…so, what’s up?”

“Mannnnn…” I bashfully dragged before running my hands down the waves in my head.

Lucie was tempting, but I wasn’t no dummy. Dior would without a doubt kill me in my sleep if she ever found out. She never hesitated to let me know how I was going out if I ever tried her.

I had never stepped out on my girl, and truthfully like Ares had said, she had been the only woman I had ever been with. I had gotten plenty of head from bitches when I was younger and every so often now, but never anything past that. Another hoe could never say they had this dick inside of them.

I constantly wondered and trust me; it was hard as fuck to keep my nose clean. These hoes stayed on a nigga heavy, but I always tried to keep my head down, and use the excuse to get more money to keep me focused.

“Damn…she’s really lucky. Well…” Lucie sighed once she realized I wasn’t biting. “…anyway, if you are ever in need of an attorney, give me a call,” she said as she pulled out a card and handed it over to me.

“That’s what’s up. So, you a lawyer, huh?” I questioned; my interest suddenly peaked on a different level as I went over the details of the business card she’d handed me.

“Yes…I actually just came back home three months ago. I’m working out of my condo upstairs for now…” she said and looked up to the ceiling before bringing her attention back to me. “…don’t really have many clients, but hopefully that changes soon.”

“That’s dope ma’…I already got somebody on retainer, but who knows, I might fuck with you. I gotta get up outta here, though. It was good seeing you,” I told her, slid her card in my pocket, and nodded before I walked away.

“You can see a whole lot more if you just give me a call!” Lucie shouted before I exited the building, chuckling at the fact that shawty hadn’t changed much.

I shook my head and looked around outside before I headed to my dark, blue G-Wagon that sat in the parking lot, sticking out like a sore thumb. My shootas were kicking back and play boxing in the lot and instantly stopped when they saw me approaching. I nodded letting them know they were good before walking around to the driver’s side of my ride to get in.

“Heavy, drop your ride off, and hop in with Hammer and y’all meet me back at the crib. Gonna need y’all with me and Dior tonight. Slick fall through the hood and see who talkin’. Any word on what them slobs planning, hit my jack ASAP,” I told them, and they nodded before we all shot out.

***

 

 

 

Later that night…

 

 

“This shit is so dope, Bae, like for real,” Dior gleamed as she stepped out of the bathroom and walked over to where I stood in front of the hotel’s room window. “I still can’t believe we are up this high. It doesn’t even feel like it.”

The view was nice, but Dior standing in front of me wearing a royal blue bra and panty set was a much nicer sight to see. She instantly had a nigga’s shit on rock. I bit down on my lip and stared at my baby girl like this was my first time seeing her. Her fresh ass was looking like a chocolate Barbie, and I swear it was taking everything in me not to snatch her up and put this dick inside her.

 Dior knew how to have me right where she wanted me, eating off the palm of her hands like I was some pussy. Even when she fucked up and had me feeling like I was ready to end things with her, shit like this reminded me why I’d be a fool to ever let her go. She was a diamond, definitely pressure, no lie.

“Hell, yea it does…took me a minute to look down. You know I hate heights,” I admitted, tryna refocus my thoughts. “But this shit is dope as fuck,” I added, and Dior laughed before I grabbed her and pulled her in front of me.

Her back was against the window now, and she looked up at me before her lips parted in a slight smile.

The ponytail she was rocking was my favorite on her. I guess it was the way it made her sexy ass brown eyes stand out. Not to mention, the style made her cheeks look fuller and kept her dimples on display. Her hair being up always made her chocolate round face look all innocent and shit, even though I knew she wasn’t to be played with. I loved that my baby was gangsta, but she knew I loved it even more when she got all dolled up. Her little, short ass had me all the way fucked up right now. All these years later, and she still made me drool like I did when we were kids.

“What?”

“Just thinkin’ how I’m glad niggas know not to play with me and try to come after what’s mine.”

“Oh, yea, and what’s yours?” Dior asked as she stared into my eyes. Her little baby hairs were curling up on her forehead and I wet my thumb and tried to slick it back down for her. She laughed and tried to shove me back when I leaned over and buried my lips over hers. She pulled back, gasped, and then looked up at me. “You still ain’t told me what’s yours.”

“You taste good as fuck, wifey,” I let her know before picking her up and placing her on the small window frame. I stepped between her legs while positioning my rock, hard dick right at the center of her box. Dior was already moaning, which made my shit jump and grow even harder. “What the fuck did you just ask me?”

“I said what’s...ahhhh!” Dior yelped the moment I ripped them lace shits she was wearing off and slid my dick inside of her. “Shittttttt!”

“You say what?” I questioned, and eased back, almost pulling out of her.

“Baeeeeeeee!” Dior screamed; her eyes wide with desperation while begging for me to go back inside of her. “I didn’t say anything, Baby! I said it’s yours. I’m yours. Please?”

“Yea…facts…stop playin’ wit me,” I boasted before slamming hard inside of my shawty. I caused her head to drop back and her arms to cuff around my neck and hold on to her nigga for dear life. I smirked before placing both hands on the window and leaning over to whisper in her ear. “Congratulations baby. I always told you that you could do it.”

Dior’s pussy tightened and her box became even wetter. I squinted my eyes and grunted, trying my best not to nut already. I couldn’t imagine nothing feeling better than this. After all this time, there were still moments when I could barely take her.

Her pussy clung to a nigga every time. Sometimes it was tighter, sometimes wetter, sometimes her shit would be so good, I would damn near be crying. She had to be made for me. For Dior, I was Cottonelle soft, willing to do whatever to keep a smile on baby girl’s face. She had a nigga by the heart for real.

“Baby, pull back some…” Dior gasped as I continued to pop my shit in her ear. She threw her hands on my chest and I grabbed them and pinned them against the window. If we wasn’t up so high in the air, the whole world would be able to catch a viewing, and no lie I wish they could. Somebody had to be a witness to all this greatness. “Babbyyyyyyyy!”

“I can see you being a dope ass lawyer, shawty,” I told Dior. “You persistent like a muthafucka! Nah…fuck that, you definitely can run up your own billion dolla company. You too fuckin’ smart. That smart, boss, ass shit is the most attractive thing I’ve ever seen. Damn, I’m blessed.”

“You think so?” Dior stopped winding her hips and stared up at me. Her face was scrunched up on some sexy shit and I slowed down and continued to stroke her box. I nodded my head and caught how a single tear slipped from her eye before she pulled me closer and buried my head into her chest. “You really believe in me more than anybody in this world, more than I believe in myself.”

“Cause’ I know what the fuck goin’ on,” I told her, as I wrapped her legs around my waist. I raised my head off her and forced her to look up at me. Her eyes were bold and intense, and I knew that meant I had her thinking. I carried her over to the bed and slightly dropped her down and quickly pounced on top of her, claiming my spot back inside her throne, where I was King. “Nigga know what he got, don’t matter what nobody else think. You know I told you, you can conquer anything. You just gotta believe it. I know you, so I know what you can do in this world. You run our house like a queen cause you are one,” I added.

“I love you so much,” Dior expressed before I buried my lips over hers. “And I’m sorry for fuckin’ up today. I should’ve taken a minute to think before I reacted.”

“Don’t even stress it ma. You know what it is with me. I’mma ride for you right or wrong no matter what the consequences are.”

“I know and that’s why you gonna forever be,” she promised.

She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around my neck before placing kisses all over my face. I was close to saying fuck it and shooting the club up, but I knew it wouldn’t do no good. Shawty wasn’t ready to have my seeds yet, and I accepted that.

After having to take care of all our asses for years, Dior was hesitant about bringing kids in this world, even though she knew I wanted a gang full. Being that I was a twin just like she was, she was scared that we would fuck around and have quadruplets on our first try or some shit. That was exactly what the fuck I wanted, though. What was the purpose of being able to be fruitful and multiply if we weren’t gonna take advantage of it? Black folks were gonna mess around and be extinct if we didn’t.

“I’m ready for my kids now…” I let Dior know tryna take my mind off the fact her box was about to take me down. “…like right now.”

“Baby, stop doing that shit,” Dior whined, and I grimaced before I stopped and stared at her. “Stop playing with me, bae. I’m about to cum, and you keep stopping. Stop that shit.”

“I’ll pull out right now and make you play with yourself. You heard what the fuck I said. Don’t ignore me.”

“What you want me to say? You know I’m not ready, and it’s not even the right time, Baby. We are still young as hell. I’m only 19 and just barely made it through school. It’s not the right time”

“It ain’t gon’ ever be the right time as long as we in this life…”

“Just please…” Dior huffed. She locked her legs around my waist and tried to make me stroke her, but I refused. “…Baby, whatever you want. Just make me come daddy.”

“So, when you gon’ take that birth control out cause I’ll snatch that shit out your arm right now,” I let her know, giving her two long strokes before I stopped again.

“Oh…my…God…Baby…” she blew out air and grabbed for me again. “Give me until after my birthday.”

I shook my head and chuckled knowing shawty was capping like fuck. I wasn’t even gonna press it, though. I definitely was cool with waiting until she was ready because once I started, I wasn’t stopping. I saw no less than ten of my little ones, all boys just like my folks and maybe one daughter. Yea, I was ready. Even though we were young, I had a lifetime time to go with my girl. I wasn’t going anywhere, and neither was Dior.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 “Don’t flex nigga! Don’t act like if we wasn’t in the streets that you wouldn’t have turned around and gone the other way had you seen me. Your gang got you feeling yo’ self, huh?” I yelled, grimacing as I stepped even closer to this slob ass nigga named Marquez.

He stood in front of me with his arms tucked tightly across his chest while mugging me. His light skin was red as fuck behind the many tattoos that covered his face. Even though he was slightly taller and a couple of years older than me, he knew not to play with me.

Swear these boys out here stayed capped the hell up. Fam wasn’t nowhere near my level, but I guess the fact he was with his army, and I was out here by myself had him feeling like he could get busy with me.

 I wasn’t even thinking when I had pulled my strap and pointed it at the middle of this nigga’s forehead. We were standing in the waiting area of Grady Hospital, where the bloods had this bitch looking like a traphouse.

They were out here heavy, and for an ordinary nigga, coming here like I did with my chest poked out and cocky as a muthafucka was enough to get you killed. I wasn’t no ordinary dude, though.

I guess you could say I had the best of both worlds, and nobody could tell me that I wasn’t royalty. My lineage was dripping with nothing but Crip blood, but due to unforeseen circumstances, I spent some very important years of my life being raised by a slob named Draco. He and his daughter Monnie found me in a park behind a tree where I had been dumped and left for dead.

At the time, I was a young jit unable to trust a soul in the world. My folks were murdered, and Baby and Ares never came back for me like they said they would. I was out here lost and without anyone I could depend on for real. Draco took me to Jamaica, around his family, looked after me, and taught me everything I didn’t know. He took care of a nigga so well that when we came back to the states, and Baby them did come back around, I felt like I ain’t even know them anymore.

Draco really had me feeling like his son, and shit was all straight until we came back here, and I started dealing with his only daughter and he’d found out about it.

Things with me and Monnie started when I was only 14 and she was 16. She was on me tough when I wasn’t even really thinking of her like that. Not like I could anyway. Her family, especially her pops was persistent on me never touching her, so I never did.

It was like the moment we touched down in Atlanta though, and Monnie had less eyes on her, she pushed up on a nigga heavy until my young ass could no longer say no. At 14, I was getting my dick sucked on a daily and fucking on what was supposed to be my rivalry’s daughter nightly.

Shawty had me wrapped around her finger and drooling behind her like I was a lost little puppy. Monnie could have it all, and I would be on some dumb shit out here tryna give it all to her, too. Everything between us was solid until I got tired of the way she was tryna handle me.

Monnie would always take advantage of the fact that she knew her pops would kill me if he ever found out about us. She would talk to me like I was a little bitch when she didn’t get her way, fuck on other niggas all in my face, and even steal from her pops while daring me to say something about it.

The older I had gotten, the more I had grown to see how evil Monnie was and decided I was gonna get on my savage right along with her. I started fucking all the hoes from school and around the neighborhood and chumped Monnie off every chance I had gotten. She ain’t like that shit at all and made sure any bitch she knew about; she ran them off.

After playing them childish ass games with her, we tried to make it work again, until she once again thought I was gonna be some sucka for her. The last time she played me, I beat her ass, and in turn, Draco had his slobs beat mine.

 It was then I realized that I would never belong to the bloods, and that it was time for me to take my ass home like Baby had been begging me to do. No matter what Draco had been filling my head up with for the time I had been with him, he wasn’t my family, nor would he ever be.

The moment I graced Baby’s doorstep; he took me in like I never even shitted on him. I didn’t even tell him or nobody else that I had gotten jumped on by the bloods and had only blamed it on some random, hating ass niggas. He never questioned me again about it, which was cool cause I knew had Baby, Ares or any of the Disciples knew about it, shit would’ve been war in the streets. Not even just that, I would’ve never been able to go around Draco or Monnie again.

Not for nothing, I was appreciative of them for treating me like I meant something. They didn’t have to take me in and give me a good home. I wasn’t even the type of  nigga to act like I starved or went without while I was with them. For that reason alone, I understood why Draco snapped on me behind Monnie. I had violated his trust, and almost killed his daughter in the process.

However, because of me maintaining a good relationship with Draco, Baby was able to further do his thing in the game by expanding his resources and having a good relationship with the bloods, something no other Crip leader was ever able to accomplish.

“Hendrix, what are chu’ doin? Put that gun down now! Are you crazy, Marquez? What the hell is going on out here?” Draco spoke, his Jamaican accent thick as he rounded the corner into the waiting room.

I briefly glared at him before placing my attention back on Marquez, who was trying his best to look more mad than scared. I could really be on that demon time if that was how he wanted it. I stared into this fool’s eyes and pressed the heavy metal into his forehead with more pressure before I sucked my teeth and stepped back.

“Drop this…” a slob from behind me started when Draco stepped in between Marquez and me, and then waved his hands.

“Drop who? Drop who nigga?” I heaved, ready to just air this bitch out and take my chances on making it out alive.

I was already heated that Monnie and Fendi had everybody in this position to begin with. I had been done with this broad Monnie. She was a for everybody type hoe and loved to play childish ass games that I was no longer interested in playing. I ain’t have time for that when bitches were out here willing to treat me like a king based off my face card alone.

I guess me giving her some dick a few days ago had confused her and had her dumb ass going delirious. I should’ve known better because she did this shit every single time.

Soon as I smashed, she swore it was because I loved her, which only gave her hope that we were gonna be good. I knew that had to be the only reason she was going around telling everybody, including Fendi that we’d recently fucked.

Loose lip having ass hoe; I thought just as Draco stood directly in my space and stared me in my eyes.

“Chu’ put that gun away or I will have no choice but to have them put chu’ down,” he said just barely above a whisper, and I scoffed, causing him to grimace. “Don’t test me, son!”

I sucked my teeth before I finally put my gun away. Draco was standing close enough that I could feel the heat of his breath too close to my fucking lips. Just as I was about to step away, Draco’s gang fell back, and he angrily waved for me to follow behind him.

I looked around, noting that all eyes were on me. I knew every one of these niggas either hated me or wished they could be me. I smirked and followed behind Draco as I adjusted the rollie on my wrist and untucked the diamond embezzled chain that Baby had gotten for my 17th birthday last year.

  I didn't even have to get inside the room to know that shit was deep. The sounds of the machines beeping echoed in the hallway, so I knew it was a lot of shit going on. My steps slowed down once Draco pulled the door open and continued to usher me to follow him. A nigga had suddenly got sick. I ran my hands through my dreads and only glared at Monnie then looked back at Draco as he shut the hospital room door. 

"Wat do I tell her mother if she doesn't make it?" Draco questioned; his voice trembled the closer I had gotten to the bed.

    “She gonna make it. She ain't got a choice," I told him, finally able to really look at Monnie.

         Damn, Dior really fucked her up; I thought to myself as I sighed and grabbed her hand into mine. The bandages around her face were practically tinged from shawty's blood, her eyes were swollen shut and her lips were dry, cracking, and about three times bigger than normal.

"I need to know what happened to my Monnie. She promised me no more trouble with any other girls or gangs. She knows that I am getting too old to be fighting in these American streets. I no like that brother of yours Baby, but you know I no deny what has taken place since he had taken control over the GDs. I’ve made me a lot more riches and it’s been lot less stressful. I no wanted no beef, but a war is on the horizon, I promise chu’ that. Every Crip in Atlanta will be dead soon. My men have been called from Jamaica. Pretty soon, my wrath will hit these streets and honestly Hendrix, I no even think chu will be safe this time," Draco ranted on, and I looked up at him briefly just as Monnie’s chest began to rise and fall.

She blinked rapidly and her heart monitor increased. I waited for Draco to get someone but when he didn't flinch, I calmed down and tried to relax a little. I couldn’t even cap like I ain’t still have love for lil baby. She had gotten me when I was too young and had fucked my head all the way up.

The affects that she had left behind was still on me heavily, which was why most times, I stayed from around her ass. It was only when she got to acting real dumb that I would give in and give her what she wanted until the next time. As bad as I hated to see her like this, I still had to do what was right for my family, like Draco would do for his.

“I swear, I never meant for any of this to happen, but you gotta tell your men to pipe down. Being I still love Monnie, I don’t like seeing her like this and the person responsible needs to pay. It was Baby’s girl Dior that attacked her. I never liked Dior anyway, so I have no problem bringing her directly to you,” I told him, only partially laying out some of the truth. “Let me bring her to you and you do what you feel is best. After that, we call shit even and everybody get back to the money.”

Draco chuckled before he swiped his thumb across his chin and began to pace back and forth across the space in the hospital room. I glared over at him, seeing that he was contemplating what I had offered him. No matter how hard a nigga thought he was, I knew we wasn’t ready for nothing Draco was coming with. His people from back home wasn’t anything normal. I knew because I grew up around them, and still couldn’t believe some of the shit that I had witnessed.

The goons on his team were really trained to go and would straight demolish every one of us. I had lost too many of my boys and wasn’t tryna lose no more. If Dior had to be a casualty to save other lives, then so be it. She knew what the fuck it was before she sliced Monnie up any damn way.

“Chu think I’m a fool, huh? Ohhhh, Dior will definitely pay for what she did to my Monnie! I already knew it was her. But why Henny? Why she hurt my sweet, sweet Monnie? She will pay with her life! Every Crip in Atlanta will pay because of her,” Draco roared. He stopped pacing and faced me. “One by one, I want Dior, and that little brat sister of hers Fendi will get it, too. I know I can’t leave Baby alive after that. I will just take them all out!”

I didn’t even really think about it before I practically sprinted across the room and had my hand wrapped around Draco’s neck. I had grown taller than him as I had aged—a lot taller than him, but I knew that his size didn’t mean shit. This nigga had a black belt in jujitsu and would lay a muthafucka down in seconds.

He’d taught me everything he knew, and he was always better than me, until I came back home and got around my brothers. Being that Baby was a master in MMA and made sure everyone around him knew a little had eventually given me an advantage over Draco. My hands were deadly weapons alone. I never needed to pull my stick out for real. It was just always easier, but no lie, this shit here was oddly satisfying.

The sounds of Draco gasping for air only made me grip him tighter. I wanted him to feel like he was within inches of his life and to feel like he would never play with me again. Only because of who he was did I let him get away with threatening my people the first couple of times he’d did it, but I could see now he thought I was gonna stand for that.

I wasn’t the same kid that he raised and manipulated. I was wise as fuck for my 17 years. I didn’t have a choice. The things that I been subjected to and forced to do had really shaped my life.

“Take yo’ phone out right now and call whoever you need to call and tell them to stand down!” I roared and Draco grimaced, stubbornly refusing to do as I asked. I took out my draco with my free hand and quickly pointed it towards Monnie. “Nigga you know better than me if I’d be willing to air this bitch out and take my chances on making it out…starting with your, sweet, baby girl!”

The door to Monnie’s hospital room flew open with several of Draco’s goons filing in the room. My heart rate fluttered before it sped up causing me to suck down the huge lump that had formed in my throat. I wasn’t scared of shit, but I knew that it was possible that at any second, it could be my last breath.

“Tell them to get the fuck out!” I roared and gripped Draco even tighter as I dragged him closer to Monnie’s bed. “Tell…”

“Get out! Go! Go now!” Draco ordered, but when they didn’t move, I brought the AK up ready to fire on Monnie. I wasn’t playing. “Gooooo!”

The horror in Draco’s voice forced them to do as he said. Once they were gone, I refocused and was back on this nigga heavy. His beady, yellow eyes were damn near poking through the sockets while sweat dripped relentlessly down his forehead. I was gonna give him one more chance to call his dogs off before I was putting a few in Monnie, him, and then thugging it out.

“Pops…” I desperately got out just as he nodded in surrender.

I lightened the hold that I had around him and he slid his hand into the pockets of his jeans and came back out with his phone. After dialing the number, Draco placed the phone to his ear and I brought my shit up ready to bust him across his head, but he quickly hit the speaker button.

“Hey…just wait…”

“Nah, nah…they gonna stand all the way down. Tell them to fall all the way back. Let ‘em know,” I yelled, and he obliged.

“What’s that boss?” the man on the phone questioned, and Draco sighed as he looked up at me.

 His black skin was shiny from the wetness that was pouring from the large pores in his face. I sniffled, and eyed him, wondering why he wanted to toy with a nigga like I wouldn’t stretch him and his daughter out. He knew that I would, so why keep trying me?

 “Boss?”

“Aye…yea…the plan is off. Don’t bother the girls. I will get wit you in a few. Standby,” Draco quickly said before ending the call. He allowed the phone to fall before he fell back like he was defeated.

“I apologize. Wasn’t even tryna do all that but you gotta understand…”

“Oh, son…I definitely understand now. Chu in love with a woman and that woman is not mi daughter. Monnie is not wrong. Chu’ are fucking chu’ sister. Chu in love son. That means I’ve lost chu. I’ve no control anymore.”

“It ain’t even like that …” I sighed, putting my AK away and moved back towards Monnie’s bed. “Why do you need to control me anyway? Fuck…Monnie just needs to stay the fuck out my business. You know what she put me through, and you know why I don’t fuck with her no more.”

“But, chu do fuck her. You come to mi house the other day son and all the time before that. This is no woman gone bitter for no reason. Chu play wit two women heart, and one gets burned. And this time it’s mi Monnie. I no stand for that!” Draco roared, the loudness of his voice causing me to turn towards him.

“Like I said, it ain’t even like what Monnie is saying. My sister, Fendi…she lies for me to Monnie. Monnie can’t figure out who I’m fuckin’ so she wants to fight every female around me. Not that it fuckin’ matters, though. I’m done with her. You take what I offered you, or…”

Draco waved me off before he angrily grunted and turned his back to me. He tucked both of his hands behind him and walked towards the door, only stopping once he placed his hand on the handle. He looked over his shoulder at me before landing his stare on Monnie.

“She is mi world and for her I will destroy any man or woman that tries to take her away from mi. Chu get Dior prepared for a Blood sacrifice, and chu no bother mi Monnie ever again. Chu come near her, and I will kill chu, son. I will do it. Mi and your brother have no more business. Tell him he is to never contact mi again. We’re done.”

“Maybe you need to send shawty back home with her moms. You see yourself she keeps causing problems,” I told him, trying to ignore his emotional outburst as I made my way towards where he was. “I ain’t the one that needs to stay away from her. Do you see me out here fighting niggas behind her? She the problem. Not me.”

I brushed past Draco and pulled on the handle to open the door. His soldiers were on go and ready to take me out, but one look from Draco made them fall back. Even if we were beefing right now, they knew that he loved me like I was a son and would pop anyone of them if they’d ever harmed me. The last time I was touched had been the last time. Since then, I’d looked out in a major ways and Draco would always be indebted to me, as I would be to him.

I glared over my shoulder at him before I rushed out of the hospital, so that I could get up with Baby and update him. The nigga was gonna be dumb hot but fuck it. Dior’s ass swore she wasn’t into this gang shit but go off and do stuff like this. If the hoe was riding for the set like she really claimed, it was time for her to put up. Draco was gonna come at her with all he had. Regardless of how anybody felt about it, a blood sacrifice was the best solution for everyone involved.

“You stupid, bitch ass nigga,” was the first and only thing I heard the moment I stepped foot out of the hospital when I was suddenly yanked by my dreads like I was a bitch.

 I didn’t even try to see who it was before I pulled the nine out that I had tucked at my side, and quickly freed myself. I placed the gun to the person’s head, ready to pull the trigger until I realized who it was. The terror in her jaded hazel eyes freaked a nigga out and pushed me to calm my trigger-happy ass down.

“What the fuck are you doing? You tryna get yourself killed out here?” I grilled her, before I looked around cautiously and then yoked her little, short ass up. The ponytail on the top of her head flopped from side to side as she tried to fight me along the way to my car. “Aye, chill the fuck out before we get caught up out here. Slobs got this bitch flooded and you on some dumb shit right now!”

“Don’t give no fuck bout none of that. Put me down you stupid ass slob!” she yelled, and I pretended as if I was gonna drop her. “You bitch!”

“Yea, I got your bitch,” I let her know.

Soon as I got to my car, I pressed down on the handle and made the doors unlock. I threw Fendi on the inside causing her ass to land in the passenger’s seat and her head to hit the window. The moment I sat down, she swung at me and a hit a nigga dead in the eye. I shook my head and brought my hand up to rub the pain away.

This girl was crazy as fuck, and knew she could get away with so much, which was why she was always doing dumb ass shit like this. Just like her sister, for real.

 I started the car up while trying to ignore her when she hauled off and hit me again. This time I was ready to punch her ass back. I turned towards her, but the moment I stared into her eyes, my body seemed to melt like butter in the seat.

Angrily, I swiped my hand across my nose and sped out of the parking lot, headed home. It was a little past ten at night, but the Atlanta streets were still packed like it was the middle of the day. Like always the cap ass niggas in the scat packs raced around everyone, acting like they controlled the roads and shit.

“You so fuckin’ ignorant! I just wanna knock that smirk off your face!” Fendi yelled out of nowhere and popped me in my eye again.

This time her long ass nail poked me in the eyeball and caused me to lose my vision for a few moments. The car swerved out of control and veered off the side of the road and was damn near about to clip the curb but luckily, I caught it in time.

“Bruh…” I yelled and forced myself to calm down before I snapped on shawty. She was really testing a nigga and had me ready to snap her damn neck for all this extra aggressive shit she wanted to be on. I jerked the car over to the right and pulled into the first parking lot I came across. “…don’t put your hands on me again,” I got out just before I pushed the gear into park and rushed out the car.

Snatching the blunt that I had tucked behind my ear, I pulled out a lighter and then quickly lit the tip of it before bringing the hay to my lungs. Most days it was still hard for me to believe that I was only 17. Life had been hard as a bitch for me.

I had seen more death than I could keep up with, and most of the time felt like I was fighting for demon status. No matter how hard shit got, I always remained a fucking soldier out here, but for some reason, when it came to a certain somebody, l always ended up doing some lame shit. Not even Monnie could get me like this.

     "Hit me again, and watch I deck you across your fuckin’ shit this time," I told Fendi once she had gotten out of the jeep and stood in front of me. Her hands were tucked across her chest, and she stared at me with them cunning ass eyes of hers. Her chubby cheeks looked twice its normal size being she called herself pouting. I licked my lips and leaned against the hood of the car before taking in another pull off the weed and just stared at her. She was so damn pretty to me, looking like a replica of the female rapper Asian Doll, only she was thicker, shorter, and more chocolate. "See what the fuck you done got us into, always running off your damn emotions and shit."

"How the fuck am I running off emotions? Maybe if you stopped playing with my head and doing so much to hurt me then maybe I wouldn't be so emotional. You tell me you don't give a fuck about Monnie, but you keep finding yourself everywhere she's at…” Fendi screamed as her head did this little side to side circular motion. I watched her thick lips and found myself being more and more turned on just by the way they moved. "…then you go and fuck her and I gotta hear everybody at school talking about it and how they hoping y'all gonna get back together. Do you know how hard that is for me? How much it hurts?" 

      Suddenly, Fendi burst into tears and covered her face with her hands, and like the sucka she always made me, I rushed over to her and wrapped my arms around her. I hated to see her like this. Shawty was about the only good thing going in my life and like usual, I managed to do something to fuck up the way she perceived me. All the promises I made her, I barely kept and truthfully, none of it was ever intentional. I just wasn’t made to be right, and girls like Fendi wasn’t made for savages like me. That was why our family didn’t want us to ever deal with each other. Baby knew how I could be, and knew that if I destroyed Fendi, it could potentially ruin his relationship with Dior.

Of course, Fendi was a big girl and could handle her own. The gang had given her some gangsta ways, but to know shawty was to know that on the inside she was truly soft and pure and that was the main reason I cared so much.

“Chill man…what I always tell you?” I asked Fendi, and when she didn’t reply, I stepped back and forced her to look up at me. She tried to pull away from me, but when I kissed her lips, her demeanor softened a little. “What the fuck I always tell you?”

“That it’s us against the world,” Fendi sighed before she rolled her eyes, refusing to look at me any longer.

I stared down into her eyes, and sadly damn near buckled at the knees. Fendi’s chocolate skin was on another level of melanin. She had the softest and prettiest skin tone I had ever seen on a female and the fullest chubby cheeks that made her look too damn young sometimes. Her oval shaped eyes were a place a nigga had to look away from often.

The way Fendi made me feel was on some other shit than with Monnie, and I wish I could get lil baby to understand that. What me and Monnie had was puppy love, and being she was my first, she had me stuck far longer than I should’ve been. What Fendi and I shared was too complicated to even understand. One thing I knew was that I was willing to risk it all, even down to my last breath.

“Sorry, a’ight? Promise you that’s my last time dealing with her on any type of level. I see this shit really gotta be bothering you if you was willing to fight Monnie,” I said, and sighed, suddenly picturing the last image I had of Monnie in my head with her face severely swollen.

“You said the same thing the last time, Henny. If you wanna be with that bitch, then just say that. What reason do you keep telling me you love me if you just gonna keep hurting me?” Fendi whined and again, I sighed. “Do you want me to just leave you alone and go be with somebody else?”

“Why the fuck you gotta play with me, though? You really like pushing it wit me, on God, and I’on like that shit,” I snapped, that weak shit quickly leaving me at the mention of her fucking with somebody else.  Fendi smirked and seeing that snide ass smile on her face pushed me to buck at her. She jumped before she drew her arm back and punched me in my shit again. “Aghhhh, fuck! That shit ain’t cool, Fendi! What the fuck? That’s why we in this shit now because of your fuckin’ attitude yo’!”

“Why would you even jump at me like you gonna hit me? That ain’t cool. Cheating ass bitch. You wanna blame me for this shit, but not on the fact that you have the inability to choose family over the fuckin’ opps! Fuck you, Henny! Take me home, and don’t ever talk to me again. I’m done with you, and that’s on gang slob nigga!” Fendi emotionally screamed before she stormed off to the car.

She jerked the door open, and I glared back at her before deciding to relight my blunt and chill out for a few more minutes. The door to my royal, blue Rubicon slammed and I grimaced before taking a pull from the weed and allowing it to tickle my lungs.

Everybody was always telling me to choose, but nobody ever took the time out to see shit from my side. I ain’t ask to be born into this fucked up world, and I damn sure didn’t choose my circumstances. I was the only one that had to go through what I went through whether it was with my family or with Draco.

Some shit and some situations weren’t as simple as black and white, and unless I had no choice but pick a side, I wasn’t going to. Fendi had better made sure she understood that no matter what side I found myself on, she was always gonna be right there with me. She had no choice. Fuck it.